I wear a mask every time I talk to people online, because I wanted to be like that person even when I'm not. But not even that mask could hide my real self
I look at people around me with envy, every single one of you, you're all better than me, you're having a better life than me, you look better than me, you sound better than me, and every good thing I can think of
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I go here whenever I'm sick of pretending to be happy
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Profile
- Work Place:ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ
- Gender:Human.
Life Event
- 07/1924 ㅤ Retired
- 12/2023 TheFuture
Details
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Recommended gadgets
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Favorite music
Touhou music
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Favorite color
Soft/pastel colors
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What you eat when hungry
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Do you know the thing where your friends are sitting on this table but there was no space for you so you had to sit on the table next to them? I experienced it before
When I was at 1st grade, I met this girl. She was my friend... Or maybe that's what I thought. One day I was with her and her friends, we were playing with one of her friends' clay set thing. We went to sit on a table, but they made me sit on the table next to them because there was no room for me (fun fact: there was). They ignored every single thing I said as if like I wasn't even there. They let me play with their clay but only the mixed up one, the one they didn't need. That time I pretended that it's fine, but I'm not.
When I make a joke, nobody laughs, but then when this other person says the same joke I made, everybody laughs. I'm happy that my joke made sense, haha.
Is it really bad to crave attention?? I never had any when I was younger! Everybody stares at me like I'm some alien or whatever the hell they're thinking about me
It's always them who gets attention
Why does nobody want me?
I view life as a competition, and I'm losing to everyone
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Hi I'm her in the future and i can confirm idgaf if i get attention from my family or not anymore
Why am I thinking like this
How am I supposed to live happily if I'm like this
I told myself not to use this account ever again, but here i am
We don't have any ropes rn
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Seriously bro
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HAHAHHAHA help
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THERE ARE KNIVES??? IDOT
I've been thinking about it for some days now, nobody would notice... I guess
Maybe it is better to enjoy the rest of my life, instead of being upset over a small thing. A lot of stuff matters a lot more than the things I mostly think about, if I could only feel that way-
I just don't feel like I'm still there, I bet if I hadn't talked in a few days, nothing would've really happened tbh,
And it's supposed to be like that
If I keep thinking about *that* then my own emotions and feelings would go out of control and control me instead of them being controlled by me.
If everything keeps going the same way, then everything will get worse until some point I'd wish that I wasn't here anymore
And that's what's happening now.
If only I could be more happier independently, if only I could see the real value of everything around me, maybe I'd be having a better life now
Why do I even want his attention though? It's just a big waste of time, nothing works. After I talk with him, the conversation stops and will never start again unless if I start it.
She's so lucky he talks to her, I- I wish I was her
She's way better than me, everybody loves her so much, she's better than me, she's better than me, and she's better than me
That's how I think right now, because you'd rather talk to her than to me. I bet you won't even see this, will you? I don't even think I'm of any value to you, I'm sure I don't mean anything to you, and if I'm gone you wouldn't even notice it!
I wonder how happy you could be without me... Probably happier than when I'm there.
If only I could feel the same about you, if only I could do the same with you, maybe I'd be happier, maybe it really is happier without me
And I'm starting to lose my mind because of it, if you hate me just say that you do! I'm so tired whenever you tell me that I'm important to you or anything but then will rather talk to someone else than me-
I hate these feelings. I hate, I hate.
I hate everything I think about
I can easily numb physical pain, but... Why does 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯 linger?
It feels like it's carved in my heart, since you started to ignore me.
I wish I could ignore all of these and ignore you as much as you do to me but
꒐ ꉔꋬꋊ꓄
ꁝꄲꅐ ꒯ꄲ ꌦꄲ꒤ ꒯ꄲ ꓄ꁝꋬ꓄? ꒐'꒯ ꒒ꄲ꒦ꏂ ꓄ꄲ ꒒ꏂꋬꋪꋊ ꊰꋪꄲꂵ ꌦꄲ꒤. <3
ꃳ꒤꓄ ꌦꄲ꒤'꒒꒒ ꒻꒤ꇙ꓄ ꉣꋪꄲꃳꋬꃳ꒒ꌦ ꒐ꍌꋊꄲꋪꏂ ꂵꏂ ꋬꍌꋬ꒐ꋊ, ꒒꒐ꀘꏂ ꌦꄲ꒤ ꋬ꒒ꅐꋬꌦꇙ ꒯ꄲ. <33
ꌦꄲ꒤ ꏂ꒦ꏂꋊ ꊰꄲꋪꍌꄲ꓄ ꒐꓄ ꅐꋬꇙ ꄲ꒤ꋪ ꋬꋊꋊ꒐꒦ꏂꋪꇙꋬꋪꌦ, ꄲꋪ ꂵꋬꌦꃳꏂ ꌦꄲ꒤ ꒻꒤ꇙ꓄ ꒯꒐꒯ꋊ'꓄ ꋪꏂꋬ꒒꒒ꌦ ꉔꋬꋪꏂ ꋬꃳꄲ꒤꓄ ꒐꓄ ꋬꇙ ꂵ꒤ꉔꁝ ꋬꇙ ꒐ ꒯ꄲ, ꄲꋪ ꂵꋬꌦꃳꏂ ꌦꄲ꒤ ꇙ꒐ꂵꉣ꒒ꌦ ꒯ꄲꋊ'꓄. <333
꒐ ꒯ꄲꋊ'꓄ ꒯ꏂꇙꏂꋪ꒦ꏂ ꓄ꄲ ꃳꋪꏂꋬ꓄ꁝꏂ, ꅐꁝꌦ? ꒐ ꓄ꁝꄲ꒤ꍌꁝ꓄ ꃳꋬ꒯ ꉣꏂꄲꉣ꒒ꏂ ꒒꒐ꀘꏂ ꂵꏂ ꋬꋪꏂ ꇙ꒤ꉣꉣꄲꇙꏂ꒯ ꓄ꄲ ꒯꒐ꏂ, ꌦꄲ꒤'꒒꒒ ꃳꏂ ꅐꋬꌦ ꅐꋬꌦ ꅐꋬꌦ ꁝꋬꉣꉣ꒐ꏂꋪ ꃳꌦ ꓄ꁝꏂꋊ.
ꌦꄲ꒤'꒯ ꃳꏂ ꁝꋬ꒦꒐ꋊꍌ ꋬ ꅐꄲꋊ꒯ꏂꋪꊰ꒤꒒ ꒒꒐ꊰꏂ, ꋬꋊ꒯ ꅐꁝꄲ ꀘꋊꄲꅐꇙ, ꂵꋬꌦꃳꏂ ꌦꄲ꒤'꒒꒒ ꊰ꒐ꋊ꒯ ꇙꄲꂵꏂꄲꋊꏂ ꌦꄲ꒤ ꋬꉔ꓄꒤ꋬ꒒꒒ꌦ ꉔꋬꋪꏂ ꋬꃳꄲ꒤꓄, ꄲꋪ ꂵꋬꌦꃳꏂ ꌦꄲ꒤ ꋬ꒒ꋪꏂꋬ꒯ꌦ ꒯꒐꒯.
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Idor
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Hehe
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Ay wow anniversary nice
I wish I was interesting...
...just like her, haha
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She ain't even that interesting bro
does anybody want me here? i'm starting to see reasons why i shouldn't keep myself alive at this point
I still have no idea if anyone really does want me alive.
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You, you idot
If I was her, will you talk to me?
I wish I was her
so maybe you'd want to talk to me
I keep wasting my nights hoping you would tell me anything
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Ewww yuck ayusin monga sarili mo
I don't wanna wake up ever again
I don't see anything new
If I keep getting ignored day by day
I wish I just forget about everything
I have it, but... It also feels like I don't have it, hmm. Strange
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Yourself *badum tss*
I hope she wakes up already–
She's the only person who really wants to talk and hang out with me, so...
Please wake up Shira
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Who
If only I was an obedient girl
Maybe everything would be better
Maybe
I really had to speak to get noticed by someone huh? I'm so pitiful and pathetic, yet anybody doesn't do anything to get noticed, what kind of sorcery is this?
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Yesyouare now shutop
I hate you brain.
ㅤ liked!
ニゴ
What am I supposed to do now...? Why-
Why am I so dumb? Please, anybody, help me-
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*future you (me) being able to make ourselves better heheheheheh idot*
I'm so stupid, I get ignored all the time and it's my fault. I should just go suffer forever. I don't deserve anybody's love. I hope I'll be gone soon.
Jass, you used to be a good person! People used to like you, look at you now, you can't even solve your own problems and now he doesn't want you anymore! Why are you just so stupid, you're such an idiot. Why would you want anybody's attention when you never gave one to yourself? People get tired and sick too, and so does he! How many times do I have to tell you to shut up?
ㅤ liked!
makima
I'm the worst. All I ever do is to complain about the pain I get, but I never really think about how much pain I give to everyone. I deserve to bleed and suffer. I keep yearning for people's attention because I never had any when I was younger. Why do I keep ruining everything? It's my fault that he doesn't want me anymore as much as he did. I knew I was worthless, what am I even proving myself? I keep ruining everything and I make everyone feel bad. I kept saying "you can do it, I believe in you" to others while I can't. There's nothing good in me and nobody likes me anymore. I deserve pain and suffering, and I should be quiet so I won't make anybody upset.
I'm so close to giving up, dammit.
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Ang hina talaga ng logic ko dati no
I feel like everything I say is bad and that I need to stop talking to people
And the one I said above is bad too
And this ↑
And this
And this
And this
Yeah
i cant even be responsible for once
i cant be a good person for once
i never really tried my best
i keep dreaming and dreaming, who are you kidding, jass? THOSE ARENT REAL
nobody deserves to bleed because of me
why do i have to exist
i bring nothing good in this world
i let everybody down
i ruined everything
so if anybody sees this,
please
please give me a reason why i should still be living now
they both look cute though, "" used to be one of them but now its just the two of them, who knows what the hell im talking about
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It's me, her future self and i forgor
do i really need to speak first- it's okay though there's nothing interesting in me so i'm not surprised
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Puta
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Gagi andami neto
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Chill
If this reaches out anyone, I don't think I'd feel anything anymore
I feel like I might fall unconscious
Also good luck for me, I insisted on keeping awake all night hoping something would happen but again, no
I hope I won't be weak all day like usual when I don't sleep at night, I don't wanna faint again
Cant believe I wasted so much time venting shit