This keeps happening. I’ll like a guy, get obvious hints, and then right when I figure out my emotions he gets a gf. So then, I push my feelings aside because they’re both still my friends and I always put they’re feelings before mine. I don’t think I can anymore, I have too much bottled up inside and too many things I’ve ignored for everyone else’s sake. Regarding the boy problems, I might as well be a test dummy. They practice they’re flirting on lme, and then leave me wondering what I did wrong, make me put the blame on myself. Or, I’ll really like someone and I’ll be pretty sure they really like me too, then someone tells me otherwise and it’s all I can think about even though it could be false. Ok, typing all this while in a not crying my eyes out over some stupid guy, it sounds super petty. I am so petty and selfish good lord, I’m sorry.

I am fine, physically. Mentally, eh. I’m a lot better now, for some reason drawing out how I felt made me feel a whole lot better.