So last night I had a really deep talk with my dad and after he left everything went foggy and cloudy and tinted dark and hot and I was sweating and crying.

So after that I felt something I've never felt before in such strong urges. I keep a box of sewing stuff in my room at all time because I like to sew and at that moment I wanted nothing more than to rip my arm up to shreds.

I was texting my cousin the entire time and I got out one of the needles from the box and made a scratch on my arm. But I was luckily too scared of pain to draw blood. But then I ended up stabbing my lower lip.

It bled alot and stained my pillow case.

I'm scared and confused what possessed me to do that. So my question for you guys is what kind of attack happened pre-needle? Like, is there some sort of thing that makes those thoughts appear?

Well that's it for the sad stuff. I added a bts meme because I wanted to lighten the mood of this. So there it is. I'm that one sinful person who ships irl people and isn't ashamed of it enough to stop lol. Bye for now.