I always wonder what would happen if i disappeared,then realize i already have-no one messages me, i never recieve calls.

The love of mylife cheated after 5 years.
The man who came after took something i can never get back and my body suffers because of that.
My family falls apart as i sit upstairs on hotline calls-
My therapist refuses to contact me back.
And all my "friends" do is bring up the man who stole something that made me feel pure and innocent.

Ive stayed clean but i fear the best thing for me to do is to goto the hospital. but i fear they may never clear me.

I'm tired, and yet no matter how much i rest and retrieve myself, one thing comes right after the other.