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*sigh* who the hell even am I?!




I am worth nothing. Nobody even wants me. “Uncultured and stupid” “we all hate you!” They say… I have no purpose in my life! I can’t make myself happy, and I just make everyone miserable! I’m a terrible person… my life is worth nothing, might as well die. Nobody needs or wants me. I’m such a freaking crybaby! I need to shut up, nobody cares about my problems… they’ll just pity me! Why am I always the pitiful one? I’m left out of so many things! I can’t show anyone I’m dying inside… I have to hide it all… I gotta smile… for everyone… I can’t just be a pest… I need to be important!… what was the last time somebody told me they needed me? If it even happened, I do not recall the time… nobody cares about my feelings… but you know what? That’s perfectly okay! I DONT CARE! I DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT MYSELF. I don’t care… say what you will… I’m just an empty shell of a girl. I’m a nobody, I am nothing. The outcast. And you know what? That’s fine. I’ve always been. Rejection, loss, sadness, anger, suicidal thoughts, anxiety… that’s fine… if it makes somebody else feel good about themselves, they can continue as long as they’d like… I don’t mind… I’m a doormat anyway… you can step on me as much as you’d like… I’ll always be there for you, even if you’ve done me wrong… I’ll give you as many chances as you need, as long as I can make somebody happy…

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Vent ( I think )

I feel cursed... I have no one. Everyone that's close to me is sick or Dead and I am alive and I'm well. Why can't I be the one that's sick? Or Dead? Why does it have to be someone close to me? This is why I have depression and I hate myself, when ever people say they love me I always know they don't. I don't think I'll ever have anyhing or anyone close to me... I'm just bad luck everyone that's close to me dies or gets sick, I had a friend online and a few weeks later he got into a car accident. I had pet he died on the some weak that my other kittens died. I had a friend and he thinks I betrayed him, I'll never ever have anyone... Maybe death really is my only freedom?

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