No tw as far as I'm aware beyond unwanted thoughts



So my thoughts are being mean to me. Not in the sense of it hurts me directly but if I said them out loud it definitely would hurt others. Like I was imagining a fake argument as one does (about my mom) and I thought of a statement that made my heart sink as in I would never say that to my mom even in a heated situation, it would also apply to me somewhat (if already friended you can ask for me to dm you what it was because I don't feel like saying it out loud here either). I question if sometimes my thoughts are a separate entity with more sinister objectives or like isn't afraid of being mean. Because I will have full on conversations with myself and only myself in my head that actually gets somewhere. No I don't have voices in my head it's just my internal monologue but I wonder if my monologue isn't me or isn't *fully* me. I've seen some things on OCD and that's a possibility from what I have related to heavily Im just afraid to put another undiagnosed label on myself. Autism and ADHD are already big labels that are for certain but still undiagnosed. Both of which I took a long time to come to terms with when people mentioned it to me(other autistic friends, autistic family, and even a therapist recommended it. ADHD was more of a self discovery with many many videos from ADHD people that I all too well related too) so the possibility of me having yet another mental disorder makes me feel uneasy or guilty for even considering it. Anywho point is I hate my mind sometimes because it decides to share with me unwanted info/ statement/image that won't go away. Sorry this is long.