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poem [wip maybe]

deacon
-
thorns cut into my wrists .
the roses no longer visible , though i can smell them .
i can smell the roses , my saint , hes here .
ive quoted the prayer but never asked what it meant .
my priest never wanted to save me , i was a sacrifice .
sorrel eyes glare at me , still as beautiful as always .
the thorns cut into my neck , i wince and beg .
"this is what you were born for , my love"
he loves me , the priest .
he holds on to my hand and he praises me .
he tells me ive done so well and that now , ill help everyone find Him .
he never loved me , the priest .
im just a deacon , an offering to Him .
i was always a varlet , but he'll forever be my saint .
my perfect martyr , my saviour .

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h left a comment!

poem [wip maybe]

deacon
-
thorns cut into my wrists .
the roses no longer visible , though i can smell them .
i can smell the roses , my saint , hes here .
ive quoted the prayer but never asked what it meant .
my priest never wanted to save me , i was a sacrifice .
sorrel eyes glare at me , still as beautiful as always .
the thorns cut into my neck , i wince and beg .
"this is what you were born for , my love"
he loves me , the priest .
he holds on to my hand and he praises me .
he tells me ive done so well and that now , ill help everyone find Him .
he never loved me , the priest .
im just a deacon , an offering to Him .
i was always a varlet , but he'll forever be my saint .
my perfect martyr , my saviour .

Read more

h left a comment!

just a ventity-vent-vent
i'll feel better eventually







body image problems coming to attack me againnnn~~
like bruh i'm trying so hard
exercising almost every day, stretching, plus the sports i do, ect ect
but nothing's working, i still look like a... fat thing
my face looks too chubby, and so does my body
like why is my body so... wide ? and chunky ? why am i STILL FAT after so long of exercising regularly ?
i get many compliments from people (my mum says that people come up to her and say that my performances in my sports look great, and i'm this, and i'm that), but.... i literally dont know why or how but i just can't agree
i still end up crying, and feeling insecure and ugly around everyone else
like why is my stupid brain so mean to me XD--
i know that i just need to stop being so hard on myself, think more positively, accept who i am, stop getting so upset of not doing everything i need to do that day, ect ect
but... it almost feels like i dont do any of those things because i hate myself too much, and that i don't quite... deserve those things
or maybe because i let out my frustration, sadness, and emotional pain on being mean to my body and mind, therefore i've built up a habit of that or something
so now i'm... stuck. cuz if i can't practice my self love and stuff, how am i going to ever improve ?
i'm just...

so jealous of other people and disappointed in myself.
=(

anywayyss have a nice day/night/avo, you didn't have to read this yknow

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h left a comment!

poem , fuck u kys faggot

i grip onto my shirt while i sob . " why ? why did you do this ? "
he he doesnt answer , its like he knew this would happen . still , he smiles .
hes perfect and i love him for it . " why wont you answer me ? "
i grip my shirt tighter , its my lifeline .
he tells me he loves me but it doesnt feel like its the truth , its a promise hes going to break , an empty threat .
" please , just tell me why "
im begging now , he doesnt see it .
id kill myself for him .
id kill myself because of him .
i grip onto my shirt as i sob , its killing me from the inside .
he smiles again , i smile back , how could i not ? hes perfect ,

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